Look, I didn’t plan any of this: an introduction

Hi, I’m Becca.

You may remember me from that time I got blackout drunk and bitchslapped everyone, and a snarky social media presence which basically centers around one of the following five themes:

1) Pictures of food/my cats in compromising positions
2) Why I don’t believe in God and how religion is destroying the world
3) Being a bleeding heart liberal
4) Drinking, or how drunk I am
5) The fact that I’m never having kids, and how sorry I feel for anyone who does

And then this happened:

Gross, right? I totally peed on that and now I’m posting it online.

Go ahead. Say it.

Total hypocrite. The worst that ever was.

Children were never really part of the plan, but sometimes an entire bottle of wine happens and you either wake up the next morning with a $50 housekeeping surcharge or a surprise pregnancy.

Look, I didn’t plan any of this.

Could it be that life sometimes decides for you?

So is that the comforting narrative we’re going with?

Listen, some people are equipped to handle hardship and tragedy with grace and dignity, and some people are me. Some people can have just one drink and be fine, and others use alcohol as a crutch and render themselves unresponsive in the middle of the Las Vegas strip and need to be carried out of an elevator and put to bed like an invalid.

Dramatization.

Dramatization of my 30th birthday.

Out of necessity rather than choice, that life is no more. I’ve been told I need to write again as I attempt to handle mandatory sobriety parenthood.

But don’t you dare call it a Mommy Blog.

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7 thoughts on “Look, I didn’t plan any of this: an introduction

  1. First-time visitor – congratulations to you!

    Admittedly, I kinda-sorta stumbled my way here (completely sober) … I was poking around online when I saw the pink and blue P&IL ribbon in your “Miscarriage” post. It’s that time of year when October is splashed in pink, so it was refreshing to see someone else use that ribbon of mine (I designed it many moons ago) to buck the usual all-pink month to recognize a lesser-known topic.

    Like

  2. I would if it weren’t something regarding a subject that’s near and dear to me. For now, I’m content with seeing it used to raise awareness about a subject that too many are afraid to mention.

    Like

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